First, let me begin with how grateful I am that I have a wonderful husband who does so much to help me with parenting. The idea of raising children single-handed gives the idea of being a single-parent. How grateful I am to not have to be so challenged - bless all those who have to do it on their own. What I am talking about is the fact that I have only one arm. I do not talk about this very often - I try not to make it an issue of life... But yesterday Kekoa said something about it. I have always wondered when he would realize that his mommy is different. He has asked me to do something before that requires two hands and when I reminded him mommy only has one arm he just left it at that. Yesterday was a little different. Kekoa had a ball of thread all tangled together. He brought it to me to untangle. I told him I couldn't. I mainly meant that it was so tangled that it was beyond hope. But he thought of me only having one arm. He said, you only have one hand mommy? I said yes. Then he said, "We should get a paper and a scissors and cut an arm out for you." It was sweet to think he wanted to make it better for me.
I have this thing I wrote for Relief Society. We were asked to write our testimonies and/or a part of our lives that shows our faith. I thought I'd go ahead and share this. Sorry for the long post...
Women of Faith – Michele Reyes
When I was 17 years old, I lost my left arm in a car accident. I was traveling to a student conference in the middle of the night with five other classmates and a chaperone when we hit a horse. As a result of the accident I lost my left arm and badly damaged my left leg. It was an experience that would forever change my life. Though there have been difficult days and trying moments, I feel this refiners fire has given me an opportunity to witness the power of the atonement in a unique way.
My life now is all about being a wife and a mother, two roles I love deeply. Before the birth of my children, I often wondered about my adequacy to be a mother. I wondered how could I possibly do it with the use of only one arm? Twelve years later, I am right in the middle of motherhood with three sweet boys. I have adjusted well and for now the boys hardly notice that I am different than other mothers. My missing arm has gone from being a hindrance to a thing of love. Both of the older boys have become quite attached to what remains of my left arm. It is a source of comfort for them to hold when they cry and almost a necessity in falling asleep at night. This attachment might be because of many reasons, but I prefer to see it as evidence of the Savior’s ability to make something good out of something so tragic. I cannot describe the sweetness I feel when that part of me can provide such comfort to my children. Motherhood has brought a certain perspective to my physical limitation as I have felt the atonement already begin to heal me.
Having the use of only one arm affects everyday life. The daily demands of motherhood such as changing diapers, preparing dinner, or trying to comfort two or more children who just need mommy, have been sometimes difficult with my unique circumstances. These times give me reason to reflect on the reality of the resurrection and the Savior’s ability to heal me. Thus, the faith-promoting examples of healing found in the scriptures have special meaning to me.
One of my favorites is found in the Book of Mormon when the Savior visited the people in America and healed their sick. I have more than once imagined what it might have been like to have been there as one of those who were healed by the Savior. 3 Nephi 17:7 begins with His loving invitation:
“Have ye any that are sick among you? Bring them hither. Have ye any that are lame, or blind, or halt, or maimed, or leprous, or that are withered, or that are deaf, or that are afflicted in any manner? Bring them hither and I will heal them, for I have compassion upon you; my bowels are filled with mercy.”
Then, after recognizing that it was because of their faith that he could make them whole, he proceeds with his miracle.
“ And it came to pass that when he had thus spoken, all the multitude, with one accord, did go forth with their sick and their afflicted, and their lame, and with their blind, and with their dumb, and with them that were afflicted in any manner; and he did heal them every one as they were brought forth unto him” (3Nephi 17:9).
For me this account is one of the most touching events described in the scriptures. But my perspective has changed as I have embraced motherhood with one arm. I once thought I was one of the people who most looked forward to the resurrection and the idea of being made whole. But now I am not so much in a hurry. More and more I feel the reality of the atonement working in my life now. I realized the healing power need not be only when the resurrection occurs. I feel the wholeness has already begun when every night before bed, my son holds my arm so tenderly as he slips into peaceful slumber. This realization has been to me just as meaningful as any physical miracle of healing. I have decided that for now, I am as whole as I need to be.
